How to Transform Your Relationship with Alcohol
An 8-part framework to change your drinking and your life
By Karolina Rzadkowolska
I recently taught a FREE masterclass on how to stop drinking and build the life of your dreams. And I discovered that one of the biggest ways we get in our own way is with our beliefs. Now, I’m not talking about religious beliefs, but rather what you believe to be true about your reality.
Our belief systems are deeply ingrained thoughts that tell us either how to perceive the world or how to act in it. They are so strong that multiple experiments all over the world have proven that our beliefs can govern how fast we heal, how well we respond to different medical treatment, how fast we can run, how well we do on standardized tests, and even how we react to poisonous, or non-poisonous plants. Your beliefs in turn govern your thoughts, your feelings, your behavior and your results.
Basically, if you believe that you can do something, that right there is 50% of the work to actually accomplish it, along with action, inspiration, and perseverance. If you believe that you can't do something, well, you're basically dead in the water right then and there.
Beliefs completely govern our lives. In fact, they shape our destiny. And the thing is, most of our beliefs are running on autopilot and we don't even realize them and how they affect our lives.
I'm sure that you have a ton of beliefs about alcohol and your own capabilities. I know because I had so many beliefs that alcohol made me more fun, more interesting or made life less boring, or that it was what everybody did.
Those beliefs trickled down into other areas of my life where I felt limited and unable to do the things I really wanted to do. I believed I couldn't write, that I couldn't be an entrepreneur, that I could never publicly share my story, that I could never be the person I aspired to be my whole life. That it just wasn't made for me: that I was not worthy enough, that I was not capable enough or even capable of learning! These beliefs kept me held back in such a limiting story.
For years and years I didn't believe that I was capable of going after my dreams. My someday goals were sitting on the back burner waiting for somebody else to take them on because I did not believe that I could do them. And without the belief, I hardly did any of the action steps, no matter how small they were.
So how do you change your limiting beliefs?
I'm going to share with you the exact framework that I used to overturn my limiting beliefs about alcohol and set myself free to go after what I really want in this world. This 8-part framework comes directly from Become Euphoric, an eight-week program to quit drinking discover what really makes you happy in life.
Introspection
You can’t discover how you really feel about alcohol and your life’s direction without some introspection. So many of us have been conditioned to suppress our desires and deny our emotions that it’s hard to hear the inner voice of truth. That inner voice will tell you to push yourself out of your comfort zone and stop playing it safe and easy. Your complicated relationship with alcohol is completely normal, if not typical. But that doesn’t mean that you were meant to stay in your comfort zone. Learn to journal and question. Learn to dig deep and hear that inner voice of intuition.
Reflection and learning
If you’re gonna kick alcohol to the curb, you need to understand it. And realize that not being able to control it or moderate does not point to something being wrong with you. On the contrary, it’s just the science of alcohol there's absolutely nothing wrong with you to be experiencing alcohol the way that you have. But in order to move on, you need to take all of that negative baggage and let it go. You need to own the truth of your experiences and forgive yourself completely for any shame, guilt, or insecurities you’ve had.
Health and wellness
Quitting alcohol or taking a break allows you to build a solid foundation for health and wellness. No more hangovers, no more fragmented sleep, no more late-night fast food calls. I always tried to be a healthy and fit individual, but the drinking I did over the weekend always ruined my health and fitness goals. Focus on getting great sleep, nourishing your body, and doing movements that make you feel good. You will surprise yourself how motivated you naturally become to work out and eat well. You’ll look better, feel better and heal your insides. (Studies show that a few weeks off alcohol lower cholesterol, blood pressure, liver fat and cancer markers!)
Connection
So many of us learned to drink as a means to connect with others. The parties, the happy hours, etc. And yet boozy nights usually just led me to feel ashamed and embarrassed by the fake friends I made. Learning to connect authentically with others without the crutch of alcohol is such an important life skill. It’s so freeing to realize that you are far more likeable and interesting when you have your full wits about you. Get out of your comfort zone and meet new people who are also aspiring to be better without alcohol. These are your role models.
Joy and mental health
Drinking, stress, anxiety and depression go hand in hand . . . because drinking throws your neurochemicals and stress hormones off like crazy! Alcohol lowers our receptivity to dopamine and our levels of GABA and serotonin—the very neurotransmitters that keep humans happy and motivated. Regular drinking depresses and lowers these values in your brain and creates things like apathy, depression, negativity, boredom, and just feeling off all the time and not experiencing joy. Quit drinking and let your brain chemicals rebalance and you will experience pure raw joy. There is so much joy in an alcohol-free life and we deserve to live happy and awake to the world around us, to actually appreciate it instead of feeling apathetic to it.
Mindfulness
Instead of reaching for a drink every time you feel uncomfortable or feel a craving, sit with it. Learn to become present to your feelings and emotions and then to handle them in a healthier way. There are multiple techniques to notice negative thoughts and replace them. And this practice in awareness will grow your strength and comfort within, instead of reaching for something outside of yourself like a glass of wine.
Creativity
With all the mental time and energy freed up from not drinking and not worrying about drinking, there are so many creative outlets on how to spend your time and what you devote your energy to. Use this, even boredom, to your advantage to push yourself to have completely new experiences. Things you haven’t done since you were a child or things you’ve always wanted to try. New experiences help ignite your drive and ambition and discover what unique gift you want to cultivate to serve the world.
Finding Your Purpose
Quitting drinking is not just about stopping a bad habit. It’s a full life transformation and every one I know who’s experienced it has done a complete 180 in the direction of their life. By becoming more intune with your inner guide, more aware to your feelings and emotions, and more action-oriented to be creative, you discover your purpose in life and what truly lights you up. You are not stuck in limiting beliefs and stories and feel the vibrancy of your full potential to go after what you were made to do on this planet.
Because I believe you were made for so much more. You have such a unique gift, a unique talent, a unique story, that only you can impart onto the world. Only you can share that gift and you were meant to develop it. Maybe you don’t know what that is right now, and that’s okay. This process will help you discover it.
I cannot wait to see what you will create with this one and only life you have, when you kick drinking to the curb and discover what really makes you happy.
If you’d like some help to stop drinking and create the alcohol-life of your dreams, click here for details on my online course.
Make your desires for alcohol disappear when you read my book Euphoric: Ditch Alcohol and Gain a Happier, More Confident You. Click here to get your copy.