Episode 79: You'll Never Change, Or Will You? with Nate Dukes

Jul 29

In this episode of Euphoric The Podcast, Karolina sits down with Nate Dukes. Nate is the author of You’ll Never Change, and shares his story all around the country. At his lowest, Nate was addicted to drugs, stole a car, and ended up in jail. Today, he shares his inspirational story of overcoming drug and alcohol addiction, reclaiming his life, and how we all have the power to change. Listen as he shares the incredible ability we all have to transform our past, create the life we want, and impact others in pursuing their dreams. Allow yourself to imagine without limits. What could be possible? What have you always longed for, but been too afraid to go after?

Learn about the power of consistency, the importance of connecting with mentors, and why it’s so critical to get comfortable with discomfort to get to the other side of our growth. We also explore how sharing deeply vulnerable parts of your story while you’re in the messy middle can inspire others.

Your decisions determine your destiny

Growing up in poverty, Nate developed narratives of scarcity and inferiority from a young age. As he entered college, he discovered alcohol and drugs and they quickly became an escape for him. Throughout his undergrad years, Nate caught in the middle of his education and the party scene and after four years he was without a degree, moving back in with his parents.

After reconnecting with an old friend, Nate co-opened a new bar in town. The venue was tremendously successful and Nate found himself with more money than he ever had access to. Still unhappy and trying to fill a void, his drug addiction worsened, and Nate found himself sinking into gambling. After losing all of the business money, he was forced to sign over his ownership of the business.

Spiraling downward and in a cycle of stealing and being fired, Nate was living in the narrative of, “you’ll never change.” At his lowest, he stole a car, and after being arrested he spent six months in jail. It was during this time Nate had a profound spiritual experience and realized he wanted to make changes in his life.

After Nate was released he connected with a mentor and a community of people that challenged him to go to places that were uncomfortable, but ultimately lead him into a season of growth and transformation. It was over these years of focusing on his personal development that Nate realized that the reason some people change and some don’t is rooted in relentlessness. Change happens when you take steps every day toward becoming who you want to be.

We all have the ability to step into the discomfort of transformation to create what’s possible. Just as Nate transformed his life and created the life he is now living, we all have the capacity to determine our destiny.

Unlocking your dreams.

It can be easy to get caught up in the “how” when it comes to change. How will I _____?

Instead of worrying about the how, focus on the “what”. What is your vision for your future? Where do you want to end up moving forward? We can’t figure out the how, until we know the what we are moving toward.

Nate encourages all of us to start dreaming boldly without limitations. Tap into what you may have locked up inside. Allow yourself to imagine without limits. What could be possible? What have you always longed for, but been too afraid to go after?

Once you get clear about your what, you can begin making decisions to help you move toward it. Every choice you make will either move you toward or away from your vision. You get to choose everyday what actions will support you in reaching your dream.

As you consistently, daily, make decisions toward your goal, you will see your vision take root and come to fruition. With patience and persistence you can bring your dreams to life.

Nate shares a lesson he learned from Tony Robbins explaining that there is no true success without fulfillment. As you unlock your potential, you will begin desiring the same for those around you.

Turning your mess into your message

Society often teaches us to hide parts of our story - especially while we’re in the thick of the “messy middle.” It’s completely normal to worry about judgment and what others may think of us and our experiences, but our stories are uniquely ours and they have the ability to influence others for the better.

Over time, Nate learned the power of forgiveness and self-love. Sitting down with his past, future, and present, he had candid conversations with himself expressing forgiveness, compassion, encouragement, gratitude, and appreciation.

Doing this internal work is so important. His self-reconciliation enabled him to share his past and his story confidently, to create possibility and hope. He reminds us that who we were in the past is not who we are now.

Are there parts of your past that you feel ashamed of? Maybe you keep parts of yourself hidden from others for fear of what they might think. By showing yourself love and forgiveness, not only will you experience beautiful self-compassion, you will also be able to share it with others, bringing them hope and solidarity.

Now on the other side of his recovery and transformation journey, Nate is passionate about helping others who are on the cusp of radical change. No longer entangled in drugs and alcohol, he has a heart for people in recovery who are craving more from their life and are searching for tools to help them along the way.

“I'm proud of me. I do hard things. I make the right choice. I am consistent. But it's because I put the work into that relationship with myself over a long period of time. And now, that actually empowers me to share my message, because I'm not ashamed of it anymore... The person that I was, is not who I am today. And I really want that message to be very clear; who you were, is not who you are now.” Nate Dukes

LINKS/RESOURCES MENTIONED

Learn more about Nate Dukes and his book: You’ll Never Change.

Find Nate Dukes on Instagram and Facebook

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